I think I will just get this one over right out of the gate, in the hopes that some of my customers will read it and honestly take it to heart.
If I cut you off, I have a reason. I'm not so petty or bitchy that I'm going to cut you off because I don't like you or because you are annoying as hell. I'm willing to continue serving you for two reasons:
1. I really, truly want you to have a good time at my bar. I want you to say, 'Wow, that was the best damn bartender I've ever had - I'll be back tomorrow night!! And I'll bring my friends!1!!'
2. The more liquor I sell you, the higher your tab runs, the more $ I make. Yay!
Here are a few of the reasons I have cut people off in the past (for comparative studies, I guess):
1. "I've always wanted to do a waitress with her apron still on." Yeah, no. That is an inappropriate-as-f*ck comment, which shows a lack of judgment - one of the first signs of intoxication.
2. "I think I'll have a cack'n'joke. I mean, a jack'n'joke. Oh man, you know what I mean." Hell no. Slurring words, the fact that you spilled half of the last round all over the bar - those things tell me that you are losing your coordination, another sign of intoxication.
3. "What?!? You ain't got no Miller Lite? Got damn, I been drinkin' 'em all f*ing night. Don't you tell me, I think I know what I done drunk, got dammit." Sir, we don't have Miller Lite - I ran out last week. You've been drinking Coors Lite this whole time, as evidenced by that silver 'Coors Lite' bottle open and in front of you. The inability to logically follow a fact to its conclusion is classic - as is the inappropriate cursing. Me not having your beer is not a good reason to blow your stack. Note the ridiculous overreaction - I ran out, it isn't like I accused you of being a tard, which you obviously are.
4. I have served you the maximum oz/hour of liquor allowed by either my establishment or state law, whichever is lower. Please don't argue this point with me, because you will embarrass yourself. Yes, he had more beers than you had mixed drinks because it takes multiple beers to equal the amount of pure liquor in one of your double Crown & Cokes.
The thing is, everyone at my bar is over 21. This means that you are all adults, and I expect you to act as such. Pitching a huge fit and getting angry and aggressive about it is childish, and I will not hesitate to have your drunk ass escorted from the premises. The bigger scene you cause, the more justified I feel in cutting you off.
Please don't argue with me or try to come up with ways to get me to serve you again. Because I work in a hotel restaurant/bar, guests like to get creative with this one.
1. If you order alcohol as room service, I will deliver it because that is house policy (to protect our 17 year old Katie from pervs ordering booze). I will see that it is you, the customer I cut off at the bar 30 minutes ago, and leave. You get no alcohol.
2. If you leave for 30 minutes and then come back, the answer will still be no. I will see that you are the intoxicated customer from half an hour ago, and I will not serve you. You get no alcohol.
3. I will not give you directions to the nearest bar so that you can go drink more. If you say you're going anyway, I will call the other bars near this hotel and warn them not to serve you any more booze. You get no alcohol.
4. I will not tell you how to get to the closest liquor store. If you say you'll find it yourself, I will call a) the Police, because you're probably trying to walk there (and if you're driving after I have cut you off, you are a piece of shit who deserves a night at the station) and they will arrest you and b) the liquor store, in case you make it there before the Police get to you, and they will not sell booze to you.* You get no alcohol.
5. I will not sell alcohol to anyone in the same room, or to another customer if I feel that it is going to be handed to you. If I do see someone pass alcohol off to you, I will take it away or squirt something nasty from my bar gun into it, and then I will have you removed from my bar. You get no alcohol.
*This only works because the local liquor store is run by responsible individuals.
I had a great example of what not to do a few nights ago. Two men come in, maybe a dad and his adult son?
Dad: Gimme uh dubble jack'n'coke.
Son: Same.
Me: Do you gentlemen need a menu this evening?
Dad: Nah, jus give us them drinks. The first one'll probly knock me off my stool ennyway.
So no food. Food gets you more alcohol, by the way, because it dilutes and extends the alcohol in your system. These two men were redneck white trash - rude and making jokes to each other about me being a very curvy girl and if I smile all the time, wink wink. Over about 2 1/2 hours they had 5 double jack'n'cokes each. But during that last one, they grew louder and louder and more obnoxious and rude and began annoying the other guests at my bar - most of them business travelers with more class in their pinkies than these men had in their whole bodies.
Me: (quietly, so I don't embarrass them) Sir, this is going to have to be your last one. Would you like your tab now?
Dad: Wut da hell do you mean, last one?
Me: I'm sorry sir, but I've already almost overserved you. I can't legally give you anymore alcohol this evening.
Dad: Thas such bullshit. You gotta serve me till I stop paying. We'll have anuther round.
Me: I'm so sorry sir, but I really can't give you any more alcohol this evening.
For the next HOUR these two guys argued with me and every other guest at the bar, trying to get me to serve them more alcohol. They tried to convince other guests to buy them drinks and meet them outside, they tried to bribe me and they tried to convince me of bogus laws about customers leaving and coming back and getting more booze because then they're 'new' customers who have to be served.
I finally convinced them that there would be NO MORE BOOZE tonight, and they left, but not without stiffing me COMPLETELY on the tip - they paid the $60+ bill, no tip, and left, still complaining. When a few of my more awesome customers realized that they had stiffed me on what would have been a decent tip, they all chipped in and left me about 50% on the cut-off's tab, on top of tips on their own tabs. (And that is why I love love love bartending - I meet great people, interesting people and shitty people, but then there are those few who stand out, and you remember them for years after.)
So hopefully you now know what to do if you or someone you know is cut off - say thank you for the drinks, pay your tab and either hang out a bit longer (we don't mind) or leave quietly.
Happy Drinking!
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See, at my job, the servers/bartenders are not allowed to be the ones who cut off the guest. We have to take it to a member of the management staff, who in turn goes to talk to the guest. If they feel that the guest is NOT intoxicated, they can tell us to serve them more, to which we say "It's not your license on the line, it's mine. You serve them, I don't feel comfortable serving them."
If they try to force us to serve an intoxicated guest with a threat of firing, that's a lawsuit. It's illegal to fire someone over refusal to serve an intoxicated guest.
I want to work for you =)
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